Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

Prior to this week's assignment in my Master's program, I had never heard of the term"microaggressions".  What are they?  What do they mean?  As I've come to learn, microaggressions are statements of bias, stereotypical beliefs, or unintentional racial slurs made by individuals without malice or ill-intent.  For example, an Asian-American friend of mine says people are often surprised to find out that she was born in America.  While that reaction hardly seems aggressive, it is, in fact, the cumulative effects of continually being questioned about her nationality that makes her feel like a foreigner in her own land; such sentiments can lead to feelings of inferiority or of being an outsider to the dominant group.

This week, we were challenged to observe ourselves and others in an effort to detect these types of microaggressions in everyday verbal interactions.  It did not take long to see many instances of such behaviors play out in public areas, at work, and even on the phone with friends and relatives.  However, I seemed to be observing others making microaggressions against others.  It wasn't until I experienced it myself that I truly understood the concept.

A conversation began with a group of co-workers about growing up in the 50's.  A white,  40 yr. old male co-worker turned to me and said, "Man, I would have loved to have lived in the 50's..wouldn't it have been so cool?"  First of all, I'm a woman, and I hate being referred to as a man or dude.  Second of all, my response was, "Uh, maybe...If I were a man."  "What's that supposed to mean; why has it always got to be about being a man?!", he replied.  I answered, "Because that's exactly what it was about...It wasn't such a great time for women or people of color."  To which he came back with a big "whatever" and walked away.  By doing so, he completely invalidated the struggle of women and people of color were going through at that time in history by instead focusing of some superficial aspects of society or pop-culture such as classic cars, musical or clothing trends and the like.  The truth was that I felt he was actually oblivious to any of that struggle, and why shouldn't he be.   He was born a member of the dominant group as an upper middle-class, white male.  When in history has a member of his group been oppressed?  As a result of the conversation, I was labeled by him to be a feminist (a term delivered with a derogatory tone).  He at no time considered himself to be arrogant, racist, gender biased or aggressive during this conversation, but, regardless, his statements did not make me feel good.  I found myself on the defensive needing to justify my argument and my stance in support of women, hoping to educate him on some different perspectives.  However, it fell on deaf ears, and he walked away.  So, this is microaggression.  Now I know.

Truthfully, there are thousands of incidents that take place like this across America everyday.  A gay friend is asked to help decorate your apartment because of the stereotypical belief that all gay men are good decorators.  A Mexican-American girl turns down a ride with an Asian-American friend because she believes a stereotype about Asian driving skills.  A person born in American is being asked yet again by another American what country they are from.  These types of statements, bias, stereotypes and racial slurs have become so common place, how can we being to stop them?

Here is where our experience in ECE has the power to intervene.  In preschool classrooms, we often talk about the power of our words and the impact they may have on others.  Children have a right to choose their words and use them.  Preschool teacher's have an obligation to help children understand how to choose their words wisely.  By making children conscious of their choices when speaking to others, we help to establish in them a foundation of awareness about how their words and actions can impact others.  In doing so, we help them develop perspectives, alternatives, respect and empathy that can lead to more conscious living in adulthood as well.  We've all heard the saying, "sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me."  However, this is not a positive rhyme for the times, in my opinion.  Words have power.  Words have an impact.  Words can be aggressive.  And, it's time we told children the truth about that.  Through reflective anti-biased practices, anti-biased education, open communication and respect, we have the power to teach children a different way to interact with each other--one that is more consciously based on respect for others and their differences.  Imagine...what kind of cumulative effect that could have on society?